WHY I TRI
I try hard to be the best mum I can be, to be the best version of me and I do this through my love of triathlon, my love of exercise and the positive feelings being active brings.
I swim, bike, run, repeat! With the gym and classes in between, exercise has been a lifeline for me and I truly believe it can be for so many other mums, for anyone, feeling how I can feel.
Through exercise I am the real me, a better me…”
I have struggled with anxiety for years, trying and failing to push the dark clouds away and unfortunately early motherhood did exacerbate this.
I know I am not alone feeling like this as a mum.
I am all or nothing, a perfectionist. I need to feel in control, have everything in its place but this is not always possible and in most instances not ideal. The smallest of tasks can, at times, feel completely overwhelming whilst bigger challenges have resulted in debilitating physical symptoms; Numb and tingling extremities, nausea and insomnia.
The want to hide away, not engage with anyone, feeling so painfully low.
I have tried CBT and although I appreciate and understand the value of this therapy and have seen the good it has done for others, it just didn’t work long term for me. Medication just dulled the bright and bubbly side of my personality and took away the best bits of me from me and from my family.
Through exercise I am the real me, a better me.
I sleep better, I eat better.
I am strong, I am confident, I am determined, I am excited, I am happy, I am energized, I am enthusiastic, I am all of these and more for me and for my family.
I still have dark days, life is challenging. Being a mum is amazing, a privilege, but it is also hard. We can lose our confidence, who we were BC (before children!). Being a mum is 24/7, throw work and other commitments on top and ‘me time’ can feel impossible but having this time is so important, mental health or no mental health struggles.
I am the.trihardermum
Have I always been sporty?
Absolutely not. I frequently tried to get out of PE as a child and didn’t set foot in a gym until I was 38. I am now 44.
Do I always leap out of bed wanting to train?
No I do not. I train in outfits that are practical but also boost my mood, make me feel good. I enjoy getting ready to train. If I’m lacking enthusiasm I reach for something especially bright and vibrant to help motivate me.
Do I always feel better after I train?
Yes, quite simply, I do. I feel free, I feel alive, buzzing with all the good feels. Exercise increases happy hormones – fact! These feelings pretty much stay with me for the rest of the day making the day a better one. I cope better and the mundane feels well, less so.
You don’t need all the expensive equipment to feel this. I remember the same feeling riding my bike as a child. The wind, the sun, the rain, whatever the weather, just feeling free and smiling. Cycling and smiling.
TRI TRI AGAIN
So what if I had never swum front crawl before…
My first event came about because of the pandemic and the situation we all found ourselves in, namely, locked down! This affected and worsened the mental health of many, even those who perhaps previously hadn’t struggled in this way. When the winter lockdown was announced I knew I needed to use exercise to channel my negative and anxious feelings; to focus on something, to build strength and maintain confidence so, I signed up for an Olympic distance triathlon, my first ever triathlon – so what if I had never swum front crawl before, I’m an all or nothing kind a’ girl remember!
It’s perfectly acceptable to swim breaststroke in a triathlon by the way, I just wanted to challenge myself further. Pools didn’t open until the April, the triathlon was at the beginning of August. I raised nearly £2, 500 for the mental health charity Mind.
I battled my nerves and I won.
I did the event and I did it well.
I felt amazing.
I have completed numerous events since, winning one and being placed in the top five females in most others – nervous energy can come in handy!! I am so excited for next season, there are big possibilities!
I train hard, I trust the process, I do my best, I give it my all but most importantly I enjoy it and I believe, I believe in me. The triathlon community is so friendly and welcoming and amazing triathletes come in all shapes and sizes
Believe in you.
Set goals, realistic goals from which to develop further.
Start with the Couch to 5K to get out there running; borrow a bike if you don’t have one (teenage son or daughter?) and cycle in a traffic-free area to boost your confidence; local swimming pools offer lane swimming so you can swim at your own pace and not feel pressured by others if this is a concern.
Get those endorphins pumping with exercise – be active be happy!
Q&A
What was your first bike and how old were you at the time?
A Halfords Pipkin. My brother’s cast off when I was about 3.
What do you get out of cycling?
Escapism on two wheels. I feel free and awesome. I used to ride horses and have a similar feeling but a horse has a mind of its own and the fact a bike doesn’t works far better for me!
If you had to cycle across the country on a tandem who would you take and why?
Four time Ironman World Champion Chrissie Wellington. Leg power, fitness and knowledge! Granted I would probably drain her energy with all my questions but hopefully my enthusiasm would give a little back! Plus, we are both mums and on that level we are all pretty much equal no matter what our job, background age etc, we can always help one another. We go through the same highs and lows, frustrations and triumphs, mum guilt (always!) and of course the need to frequently think up a full-blown entertainment programme complete with endless snacks!
Punctures: Repair or Replace?
In the words of my brother “Whaat!!??!! You HAVE to learn how to repair a puncture!!” I am yet to do so, still living on a wave of luck and a good squeeze and peruse of my tyres before a ride!
Are you a fastidious bike cleaner?
I love a messy bike after an amazing ride, I even admit to taking photos of said mess but yes, I do like to then wash and buff a bike within an inch of its life. Gorgeous and gleaming once again and yes, this is how I feel about bikes!
Dream cycle route/destination?
Cilento and the Amalfi Coast – jagged cliffs, sunshine, pastel coloured villages and fishing towns. Olive groves and lemon trees. Wine, pasta and pizza! I love the beauty of the open countryside, mountain scenery and first and foremost being by the sea – my happy place.
Words: Caroline Lote
